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2004-08-31 - 8:08 p.m.

Allow me to be the first to point this out from the Republican National Convention. Elizabeth Dole says:

Ronald Reagan called an empire evil, and won the Cold War.

Christ, is that all it took? Just a little name-calling, and the Soviet Union crumbled? **Poof!** Apparently, they weren't made of such strong stuff as we all thought!

I wonder if that tactic is going to work on anything else. Let's try out some other derivations of that statement, shall we?

    I called chocolate the cure for AIDS and ended a global epidemic!**Poof!**

    I called Ewan McGregor my boyfriend, and now we're married! **Poof!**

    I called Kerry the President, and he won the election! **Poof!**

Seriously, that comment was just too stupid for words. Do a little research, Liddy, it took more than a few tough words to make a fucking empire fall.

And to think, there was about five minutes in the 90s when I didn't hate Liddy Dole.

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